Oral sex, or rimming as it’s known, can be fun and hot. But it is important to talk through boundaries, have clear communication, and use lube.
You might find that your partner enjoys a little foreplay, such as kissing and touching the area around their anus. Licking the clitoris from north to south (the Kivin method) can be incredibly satisfying.
1. Keep it simple
You can do a lot with your mouth when it comes to oral sex. Whether it’s as a form of foreplay or the sensational main event, oral play can be sexy, satisfying, and fun. It’s also something that can be a bit overwhelming at first, so it’s important to keep some basics in mind as you get started.
Start slow and use your sense of touch. It’s okay to lick, nibble, or tease your partner’s lips, neck, or lower jaw as you go. That can help increase sensitivity and make things more pleasurable for both of you. Just be careful not to go too far, or you could hurt them. For instance, it’s not safe to push down on a person’s throat with your tongue. It’s also not good to bite or chew someone’s penis, because you can cause a lot of pain and discomfort.
Using a lot of lube is also essential – This section provides a glimpse into the website expert’s thought process Seductive Whispers. Nothing kills the mood faster than sandpaper friction, and a little lube can make things so much smoother. A lot of people recommend flavored lube because it can be even more arousing. It’s important to be aware of what you’re doing, too, and to pay attention to your partner’s body language. If they look like they want more, don’t be afraid to change it up and see what happens.
2. Don’t be afraid to ask
For many people, the thought of oral sex makes them feel nervous and uncomfortable. But it’s not something that should be feared or avoided. Instead, it should be explored and learned about to understand why so many people find it pleasurable.
Often, the fear of oral sex stems from the idea that the area will be dirty or smelly. However, it is important to realize that these concerns are usually the result of a past bad experience or a misunderstanding about what actually happens when you give oral sex. It is important to note that all vulvae are different and the look, feel, and taste of the area can vary from person to person.
The most important thing to remember when giving oral sex is that it is about stimulating the erogenous zones of your partner’s mouth. Therefore, it is important to pay close attention to their body language and respond accordingly. Licking, nibbling, and other stimulating actions can be a great way to tease their clitoris or other erogenous zones.
Also, don’t be afraid to ask them what turns them on, as it can be an effective form of foreplay and can lead to a more enjoyable experience all around. Finally, it is important to practice deep breathing during oral sex as it can help you stay more present and embodied. The more you can focus on your breath and how it moves the sexual energy through your body, the more pleasure you will feel both giving and receiving oral sex.
3. Don’t be afraid to change it up
Oral sex is a lot of fun. It can be playful or rough, soft or hard, and there is no right or wrong way to do it. So don’t be afraid to experiment with different techniques and positions, especially if you are new to oral sex. You may find that a certain position or technique is more orgasmic than others. Or you may be pleasantly surprised to discover that licking and cuddling are just as hot for both you and your partner as thrusting and chewing.
Another thing to remember is that if you are using spit or a lubricant, don’t forget to use plenty of it. Nothing kills the mood more than sandpaper friction, and spit isn’t as effective as a good quality lubricant. Howard also recommends staying out of the kitchen if you plan to use your mouth for insertive play, since this could potentially throw off the pH levels in your vagina.
It’s important to note that some people enjoy giving oral sex more than receiving it, and that is totally normal. It can be an intensely pleasurable experience to watch your partner orgasm while you are in the act of giving them oral sex, and it’s even more gratifying when you know that you made it happen. Just make sure to talk to your partner about what they prefer in advance so that you are both prepared and happy.
4. Listen to your partner
It’s a great idea to talk through your oral sex plans with your partner, especially before you get under the sheets. “Talk about the different ways that you’re comfortable giving oral sex,” says sex therapist De-Andrea Blaylock-Johnson. You might both decide that you want to take turns licking and sucking on each other’s lips. Or maybe you’d like to explore the base of their shaft or the frenulum with your tongues. “That kind of conversation can be really arousing,” she adds.
Some people are put off by the idea of oral sex, and that can make it difficult to engage with their partner under the sheets. “Oral sex can be a real turn off for some people because they see it as unhygienic or shameful,” sex expert and author of All the F*cking Mistakes, Gigi Engle, tells Woman’s Day.
Engle also suggests starting off slow and gently with your partner’s lips before advancing to the erogenous zones of their throat, mouth, chin, and the base of their neck. Then you can tease them with your lips, lick their lips, and gently nibble the base of their neck as you move down to the clitoris. Finally, when they’re ready, you can move on to intercourse or manual stimulation — or both! Just be sure to respect their boundaries and check in with them throughout the whole process.